


Beyond the Setting Sun

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel, Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Crossover, F/F, M/M, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 03:55:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/793708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blair's interest in Mendi affects Jim in an unexpected way.<br/>Warnings: Characters die, but not Jim, Blair or any other Sentinel regular.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beyond the Setting Sun

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Sentinel/Xena crossover which I hope doesn't turn out to be as stupid as it seems.

 

## Beyond the Setting Sun

by blarney stone

Author's webpage: <http://www.geocities.com/soho/atrium/1612/blarney.htm>

Author's disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. Jim, Blair and the other residents of the Sentinel universe belong to Pet Fly. Xena and Gabrielle belong to Renaissance.

* * *

I am pain and fear and loss. That's all I've ever been, in all the many lives I've lived. Loss is my god, fear is my tribute and pain is my reward. Even before I began to remember, I knew that.

He/She doesn't understand. He only sees the beauty, the harmony of it all, not the price that must be paid, over and over again. But he's always been like that; I certainly can't expect him to change now.

It all began 2 weeks ago. I came home after a particularly fucked up day to find a naked girl sprawled on my floor. Sandburg was hovering over her, painting weird designs on her back. Too turned on (not by the girl) to be angry, I stood and watched.

The girl; quite a looker, with long, dark hair and a great body, at least what I could see of it; turned her head and smiled at me. It was a sexy, "come and get it", smile; wasted on me I'm afraid. Sandburg held my attention. He was unfortunately fully clothed, but his hair was down, framing his face, which was a picture of intense concentration. His hands moved over the naked skin with such skill and assurance, that I wondered if I could find a way to get him to talk me into doing to me whatever he was doing to her.

"We've got company, Blair," the girl purred, still eyeing me.

He glanced up, noticed me and grunted a "Hi Jim", then went back to his painting. Turned on or not, I hate being ignored, so I cleared my throat loudly and put on my best 'Jim's pissed' look.

"What's going on here?" I demanded.

Without even looking, he responded, "It's Mendi, Jim. The Indian art of body painting. I've been studying it and Tiffi was kind enough to volunteer to let me practice on her."

Tiffi, huh? Well, Tiffi's little plans for Blair-ala-mode where about to come to an end, if I had anything to do with it. "I've had a bad day, Chief. Can you wrap this up, or take it to a motel, please?" I knew he wouldn't go the motel route, not unless Tiffi was willing to spring for it.

Sandburg turned his big blue, not quite understanding what my problem was, eyes on me. "What's wrong, Jim? This is art, not sex."

"Yeah, right," I sneered, heading for the kitchen for a beer. "There's a naked girl in the loft, and you're _not_ trying to get her into bed, or wherever."

He followed me into the kitchen, just as I planned. "This is not about sex, Jim," he repeated.

"Sure it's not, Chief."

"Look Jim, I needed someone to practice on and she volunteered. It didn't have to be her; it didn't even have to be a woman," he protested, anger coloring his cheeks. "It could have been anyone. It could have been you."

Bingo. "There's no way in hell that I'd let you do that, what was it, Mendi, to me. Does it even come off? I don't want to go through life with your fingerpainting all over me."

Oh, he was mad. Eyes flashing, hands on hips; my little student of the obscure and bizarre wanted only one thing now: me naked and spread out before him. Some days life really is worth living.

"You know, Jim you need to consider expanding you horizons. There's a whole world of new experiences out there to be enjoyed. There's more to life than having a beer and watching Starsky & Hutch reruns."

He grabbed me and yanked my shirt up. I shoved him away; it doesn't pay to seem to eager.

"Hold still!" he ordered, cornering me in front of the stove.

"Get off," I snarled, my half-hearted attempts to push him away, proving suspiciously ineffective. It's a wonder he didn't figure out that, since I could body-slam him across the room, I shouldn't have any problem defending myself from the hands that had succeeded in getting my shirt off.

Tiffi choose that moment to join the action. 5'10" (Blair likes 'em tall) of naked girl sauntered up to us, smirking. "Need any help?" She was thinking threesome, but I was thinking Bye Bye. I was right.

Staring at her for all the world, as if he had no idea what she was doing in the loft, Sandburg answered, "Uh,no thanks Tiffi." Taking her by the elbow and escorting her back to her clothes, he continued with his charming brush off. "I really appreciate your helping me out, but I think we should call it a night."

She continued to object as she dressed and Sandburg continued to smooth things over as only he could. I, on the other hand, was debating whether or not to take my pants off, just to speed things along.

Finally, Tiffi was dressed and shoved out the door. My Artist picked up his tube of paint and regarded me expectantly, "Well, come over here, Jim and take your pants off."

"Have you lost your mind? I'm not taking my pants off!" I bellowed in outrage. I really should win an award for these performances.

"Don't be ridiculous. Now get over here and take your clothes off, or do you want me to do it for you?" he threatened.

Oh yeah, baby, do I ever! Grumbling, I complied. As I stripped down, I stole a glance at him. He was studying m with open admiration. I shivered; what would it be like to be that free of fear and guilt?

"You cold?" He never missed a thing.

"No," I muttered and lay down on the blanket he had spread on the floor for Tiffi. "You want me on my stomach?"

"Yeah."

The paint was cool against my skin. Sandburg was applying it with the tube instead of his hands, like I wanted, but the closeness was wonderful. As he drew his designs, his hair would occasionally scrape across my back. I closed my eyes and enjoyed.

An eternity later, he asked, "I'm done with your back. Can I work on your legs?"

Was there hesitation in his voice? If so, why? "Knock yourself out, Chief," I answered as nonchalantly as I could manage.

His warm hands lifted my calf up. "Keep your leg like this."

I would have preferred his hands on my thighs, but I wasn't complaining. He worked in silence, and I let my body relax. Just being here with him like this seemed so natural, like it was meant to be.

He began on my feet. It took all of my self control not to move. I'm ticklish and that's not the sort of thing that I'd want to get out. Sandburg was saying something and suddenly I wasn't there any more.

* * *

Golden skin under my hands; a mouth surrendering to my demands. . . So good, so much better than anything else. I wrapped a length of blonde hair around my hand and pulled her head back, exposing her pale neck. I greedily attacked it. Her pulse beat against my tongue. I sucked, while she squirmed with delight. She complained about a monster-sized hickey, but I was too far gone to care.

With strength that always surprised me, she dragged my head away from her neck and down to her breasts. Two perfect globes, begging for attention. Lovingly, I closed my lips around an erect pink nipple and teased it with my tongue. Her legs wrapped eagerly around my waist, demanding more. She would have it. I would make her scream and then she would do the same for me. But always her first, always.

I found the fiery spot between her legs and rubbed the sensitive nub. She gasped, and forced my face southward. So be it.

* * *

I jerked up, smearing the paint on my legs and feet. I was back in the loft.

"I'm sorry, Jim. I didn't mean anything by it," Sandburg, his eyes wide with distress, was saying.

"What?" I answered distracted. Who had the girl been? I'd never seen her before in my life.

"All I meant was that you work out and your body is in great shape. I'm sorry if you took that to mean um, anything else."

As confused as I was, I could still tell that he was scared to death. I reached out and gripped his shoulder. "It's okay, Chief. Everything's all right."

He smiled and then his head was against my chest. My heart forgot to beat as I encircled him with my arms. The world had gone crazy. Was that hesitant kisses I felt?

"Yes, God, yes!" I exploded, grabbing a handful of hair and pulling his head back so I could plunder his mouth.

I pushed Blair down on the floor and covered him with my body. Possession is nine-tenths of the law, was all my addled brain could think of at that moment. He whispered my name, as I rained kisses on his face. His hands ran wildly over me, spreading the black paint everywhere; my skin, his skin, his clothes, the blanket. It didn't matter. Sex is suppose to be messy, if it's any good, that is.

We got in each other's way trying to get his clothes off. Frustration made me ready to start ripping fabric, but he shoved me away, and started struggling out of layer after layer of clothing. I sat there watching him, my heart pounding and my breath coming in ragged gasps. I felt like a wild animal desperate to mate.

My dick was standing at attention and weeping with anticipation; a fact not lost on Blair. One of the advantages of being a Sentinel is being able to hear and smell your lover's heat, and he was burning for me.

The last of his clothes fell away. I barely had a chance to take in his beautiful nakedness; his furry chest, small hips, and quivering shaft, before he knocked me over and pounced on me. Grunting, he kissed and nipped his way across my chest. Ecstatically, I arched into him.

Abruptly, he moved down and buried his head between my legs. I wanted it so bad, but this was not the way it was supposed to be. With what felt like a herculean effort, I pushed his head away. Answering his confused look with a smile, I flipped him over so that he was on his back.

"I want to taste you, Jim!" he complained.

"Not yet, Chief," I whispered. "You have to be first. "

Briefly, I nuzzled his chest, luxuriating in that soft mat of fur. Then I made my way to the perfect dripping rod. Smaller than mine, of course; since he was smaller than me, but perfect none the less.

I had done this many times before, but never like this. Always it had been hurried, and shameful; a desperate, need that had to be satisfied. I had never once made love to a man that I cared anything about. It was a weakness, a flaw in my character. If I were a stronger man, I wouldn't feel this way. At least, that's what I'd always been led to believe.

But now, oh now, everything was different. Reverently, I tasted the precum coating the tip of his cock. All my heightened senses were focused on breaking down and analyzing this essence of Blair. He had a unique flavor; spice and musk, combined with an unidentifiable, but completely addictive ingredient. The street value for this stuff would shoot through the roof, I thought with a grin.

"Jim, please!" he begged, and all other thoughts save satisfying him vanished. I kneaded his balls and stroked his cock with my tongue. He was gasping and crying and trying to grasp a handful of my hair. I had him at a disadvantage there. When it was his turn. . . Shuddering with anticipation, I throated him.

He cried out, wiggling and squirming in a most Blair-like way. I sucked firmly and steadily, one hand on his dick, the other clutching a hand full of ass. At last he found a rhythm that he liked and thrust against me eagerly.

There's a trick to cock-sucking; you have to relax your throat and suppress your gag reflex. I could give lectures on the subject. I wonder what the alumni would say if Rainier offered Fellatio and Sodomy 101?

Little mewlng sounds began to come from his throat and I nearly lost it. My own dick was screaming as I grabbed his with both hands and began to massage it, all the while sucking and scraping its head with my teeth. I knew when he was about to come, and I was prepared. His body stiffened, then spasmed and a white, hot jet of Blair filled my mouth. It was too much of him inside of me. I zoned.

Minutes or hours later, I don't know, I came out of it to find myself lying on my back, while a curly haired angel lovingly kissed my cock. No more shame now, I grasped those curls and pushed his face against me.

He smiled up at me. "Welcome back, Jim!" Then the little wolfboy bit me. The glorious pain! I had been afraid that Blair had never done it with another man before, but the waves of pleasure that he was ripping from me said that that wasn't a concern.

"Baby!" I moaned.

"Baby!" His head jerked up and he glared at me. "You can't do any better than that?"

"I'm sorry, Chief, but I don't feel particularly articulate right now. What do you want me to call you?" I gasped.

"Ares, God of War."

Rolling my eyes, I said, "Okay, Ares, God of War. I want to fuck your mouth right now if that's not gonna be a problem."

He smiled beatifically and swallowed my dick. At that point, I realized my pride at my abilities in the blowjob department were blown, as it were, out of proportion. My demon lover had, and I swear this is true, my entire dick down his throat! I would have zoned again, but it felt too good. All I could do was lay there and let him do unspeakable and physically impossible things to my lucky cock.

It took him 30 minutes to blow me. He kept bringing me to the edge, then backing off. When he was finally done tormenting me, he pinched the base of my cock between his thumb and forefinger and I exploded. I've never had that much before! He swallowed it all, then licked me clean.

Blair crawled up my body, fluffed me like a pillow and settled down on top of me. I wanted to say, "I love you", and "Stay with me forever", but I'm not 22 any more, so I passed out instead.

* * *

I was with her again. We were naked, laying on a blanket in a forest, curled around each other. A tiny portion of my brain pointed out that I was now a woman and this was not quite the way thing were supposed to be.

Most of me didn't care. I was happy, sated, and snuggled up to the only person that I had ever truly loved with all my heart and soul. I touched her face and she smiled, and I didn't care about what the future would bring, as long as we were together.

The Romans came from nowhere. We were surrounded. I jumped to my feet with an evil smile on my face.

"Sorry boys, but this is a girls-only party," I sneered and drop kicked the nearest one across the clearing and into a tree.

They charged, murder and other unpleasant thoughts on there minds. I had several advantages though. First of all, I was inhumanly strong: I could fling the Romans around like they were rag dolls. Secondly, I was a beautiful naked woman and, speaking from a man's point of view, that's a huge distraction, even to one who doesn't quite walk the straight and narrow.

My lover was on her feet, swinging a wooden staff, and leaving a pile of groaning soldiers in her wake. We made short work of them. They picked up their wounded and slunk away.

"What did they want?" she asked.

"Me, Gabrielle, Caesar wants me."

* * *

I didn't tell Blair about the dreams. It's always been my policy; when in doubt, keep your mouth shut. Less chance of trouble that way. Besides, I didn't know what to make of me being a woman in the dreams, let alone a lesbian.

It's been my experience that the men who are obsessed with lesbian sex are straight, which leaves me out. Beyond a normal curiosity of who does what to whom, I've got no interest in the subject, so none of it makes sense. And then there's the girl, Gabrielle; I had never seen her before, yet in my dreams I was in love with her with the same intensity that I felt for Blair.

The whole thing had me freaked.

In the meantime, Blair and I began to settle into our role as a couple. His clothes moved upstairs along with the rest of him. We went everywhere and did everything together. It's funny how little change there was except the sex. We had truly been a couple for a long time, but didn't seem to notice it.

We didn't go to any great lengths to hide it from anyone. Blair wanted to be discreet, to protect me, at work especially, but I was tired of hiding my differences from the rest of the world, so I made no effort to pretend that we were still just friends. Oddly enough, no one seemed to be surprised by the whole thing. One day I had Blair pinned up against the wall, whispering in his ear, when Joel happened along. Not even a double take from him, just a "Hey Jim, Blair" as he walked past. All my life, I've been afraid to show the truest parts of my self, only to find when they come out in the open, no one cared.

A week into our new relationship, Blair made a special dinner of all my favorites: t-bone, baked potato smothered in sour cream, asparagus fried in butter, and chocolate pie for dessert; 'artery destroying death food', as he liked to call it. After dinner, he was washing the dishes and I was washing him.

"We should do something special to celebrate our 1 week anniversary," he suggested

My heart sped up. After only a week, I knew the kind of 'special' things Blair could do. That boy knew the Kama Sutra backwards and forwards, and was writing a few new chapters. "What do you have in mind, Chief?"

He twisted around to face me. "I'm going to teach you Mendi. I think it's appropriate since that's what brought us together."

"Oh, okay," I said with a touch of disappointment

Seeing my fallen expression, he added, "When we're done with the Mendi, I'm going to let you fuck me nice and slow and gentle, the way you like it." I smiled happily and nuzzled his neck. "And it you're a very good little Sentinel, I'm going to fuck you, only I'm not going to be nice or slow or gentle."

Those clear blue eyes held the steely resolve that I'd come to appreciate, especially in the bedroom. Grabbing a hand, I dragged him into the living room and started yanking off clothes. "C'mon, what are you waiting for? Let's get painting!"

He laughed at my eagerness. When we were both naked, we knelt on the floor together and he showed me the designs of the Mendi. Then he lay on his back and let me paint his arms and neck. I would have done his chest, but the fur got in the way, and his suggestion that he would shave it for the occasion brought a howl of protest from me.

Working the ebony paint across his pale body was the most erotic thing I've ever done. It was about trust and possession. He was giving himself to me completely, trusting me with his very soul. He carefully turned over on to his stomach and I started on his back. The desire to take him then almost overwhelmed me, but the Mendi was stronger, compelling me to finish.

When I did, he sat up; a work of art, covered with the designs. He took the paint tube from my hand, and traced patterns on my hairless chest. There was complete silence, except for the pounding of our hearts and the rhythm of our breathing. I reached out for a handful of curls and was gone again.

* * *

Gabrielle was between my legs, her tongue working its own magic in a familiar yet unfamiliar place. I was writhing, lost in sensation. I stroked her blonde head carefully; I knew my passion could hurt her, and I must never let that happen. Something broke inside me, and I screamed as waves of pleasure overcame me.

When I was able to open my eyes, I found her regarding me with a glint in those blue eyes that took my breath away. I reached for her and noticed that she was covered with the Mendi. Past and present collided, leaving nothing but confusion.

"What's wrong, Xena?" concerned filled her voice.

I sat up, speechless and stared at the flickering image before me. Naked blonde girl morphed into naked long-haired boy and back again. I glanced down at myself and discovered that I was not a woman, at least not at the moment.

I reached out and grabbed this creature who was both Blair and Gabrielle and pulled her on top of me. She sighed happily as I impaled her and bent to kiss me. I attacked her mouth hungrily. When she pulled away, it was Blair that I was holding, his knees drawn up to my shoulder to give me access to his tight passage.

Gripping his ass, I thrust into him, gasping. He caressed my face whispering, "I love you, Xena."

Then Blair became Gabrielle again and begged, "Harder Jim!"

A primal growl escaped me as I clutched my ever-changing lover and rode her/him as if my soul depended on it. She cried out in a desperate ecstasy and Blair collapsed on my chest, whimpering.

* * *

"What's wrong, Jim?" Blair's voice was filled with concern.

My eyes focused and I saw him kneeling in front of me. I pulled him close, hoping that he wouldn't shift into Gabrielle in my arms.

"I don't know, Chief. I think I'm losing my mind."

* * *

Blair sat listening quietly through the whole story, even though it was clear he was about to explode with excitement. When I had finished my tale, he grabbed me and shook me hard. If I hadn't been so freak out by the visions, I would have enjoyed it.

"Jim, do you know what this is?" he demanded, his eyes flashing with delight, and his whole body quivering. I had to smile despite myself, at his enthusiasm.

"No Chief, I don't get any of it. I don't know the girl, Gabrielle, and trust me, I've never imagined myself as woman before. I like my equipment and use it whenever I get the chance."

He grinned appreciatively, and leaned in to touch my forehead with his. "Yeah, I've noticed that. Jim," he continued, more serious. "This isn't just a dream or fantasy. It sounds like a past life memory."

I snorted with laughter. Despite being raised Episcopalian, I have no set religious beliefs, but that doesn't mean that I was ready to buy into reincarnation mumbo jumbo."Come off it, Chief. There's no real evidence to prove that. It could be another weird sentinel thing."

"Why would you imagine yourself a woman then? When souls are reincarnated, they switch gender randomly. Male and female have no meaning beyond this physical existence. Also, our soul and the souls of the ones we love are drawn together across many lifetimes. Which explains your vision of Gabrielle and me being the same person: we are the same person." Loving hands caressed my face.

"Don't you get it Jim? We've been lovers in other lives, maybe for a 1000 years, since you saw Romans in the vision. We're soulmates; meant to be together forever."

That sounded good, I had to admit. "But why am I seeing these things now? Why didn't the visions start when we first met?" I claimed the hand that was stroking my cheek and kissed it. The black paint smeared on my lips and I smiled. Then it hit me and I understood. "It's the Mendi, Blair. It wants me to remember."

Confusion clouded his sky blue eyes. "The Mendi wants you to remember? You sound as if you believe it's alive."

I traced a design on his arm with a finger. "I think it is, or at least there's some kind of intelligence behind it and that somehow we are connected to it. I had my first vision when you started painting it on me."

"Well," Blair said thoughtfully. "I could hypnotize you and try to bring out more of the memories and see what happens."

"Not a chance!" Standing up angrily, I paced into the kitchen. "You're not hypnotizing me, Chief."

"Jim," he responded with infinite patience. "It won't be you staring at a watch or clucking like a chicken or whatever it is you're afraid of. We'll use simple relaxation techniques. I promise you that you will be in control." He held out a hand, summoning me back.

I wanted to rebel, throw a trademark Jim Hissy Fit, but I couldn't. I was scared and I needed to be in his arms. He had me stretch out on the floor and he sat beside me. "Close your eyes," he gently commanded. "Focus on the sound of your heartbeat. Let the rhythm quiet your mind."

The sound of my heart filled my ears; strong and steady.Blair's comforting voice eased my fears and I felt my body relaxing.

"Empty your mind of all thoughts. Just listen to your heartbeat and. . "

* * *

We were in the mountains, Gabrielle and I. It was the middle of winter and snow covered everything in sight. Only a fool would be out in this white nightmare, but then, we were fools. The Romans had attacked a number of villages, kidnapping hundreds of children to carry back to Rome as slaves. Rumour had it that the Roman elite had particular sexual appetites and, considering the Romans that I'd known, I tended to believe it.

I glance at Gabrielle, swathed in fur from head to toe, with only her face showing. She smiled encouragingly at me, but it only made my heart fill with dread. We knew what was going to happen; we'd both seen the vision. The sensible thing to do would have been to get as far from this place as possible, but I couldn't walk away and let the Romans have those children and I couldn't persuade Gabrielle to let me go alone, so we trudged on.

A frozen eternity later, I smelled smoke and knew the Romans had stopped for the night. We eased up to their encampment. They were laughing and joking around campfires, while the children were huddled together trying not to freeze to death. A fury hot enough to melt these mountains filled me. What kind of animals were these people? They claimed to be so civilized, yet they committed such unspeakable crimes against the most innocent.

By mutual silent agreement, we decided to wait til the Romans were asleep and then try to rescue the children. We sat holding each other against the cold and the horror that we knew tomorrow would bring. I tried to pray, but I knew the Gods too well; none of them cared for the affairs of men. Our lives and deaths meant nothing to them; only our obedience and offerings.

It was well after midnight when we made our move. Most of the soldiers were asleep, with only a few perimeter guards posted. They didn't expect an attack, not in the middle of all this accursed snow. We took out the guards quickly and silently. I was both proud and saddened that Gabrielle could kill so efficiently, for killing them was unavoidable. We couldn't risk them raising an alarm and ruining our head start.

Shushing the children, we untied them. I had to smile at how they instantly trusted her and did as she said. We grabbed what skins we could to wrap them up in and made our escape.

We marched on through the rest of the night. The children were cold and tired, but they didn't complain. They understood that we were fighting for our lives. Two hours after daybreak, we sighted the pass through the mountains that would lead us to a village where I knew that Greek soldiers would be gathering to defend our lands from the invaders.

For a moment, hope filled me. Maybe the vision Alti had given me was a lie and we would survive after all. Then I heard the Romans right on our heels. We'd never make it to the pass in time.

"Take the children and run!" I ordered Gabrielle. "I'll hold them off as long as I can." I pulled my sword, turned and kissed her one last time and ran screaming like a madwoman towards the enemy. The sound of the children running away behind me, spurred me on. If Gabrielle could just get them through the pass, they'd be safe and so would she. Nothing else mattered.

I met the enemy with my sword swinging. I was soon hip deep in bloody Roman bodies. Time slowed and there was only sweat, blood and the screams of dying men.

Suddenly, a voice called, "Surrender woman, or she dies."

With terror, I turned to see what I already knew would be there. A centurion was holding Gabrielle; his knife to her throat. She had come back to help me. Her eyes begged my forgiveness and I smiled as I threw down my sword. This was our fate, nothing could have changed it. They beat us and stripped away our clothes. Some of the men had other plans, but the centurion was an honorable man, for a kidnapping murderer, and decreed that we would be executed with our virtue intact.

They laid us out on crosses. I was filled with rage and fear and so powerless to help us now. I turned to her and said, "I'm sorry, Gabrielle."

She looked at me with such peace in her face. "I love you, Xena."

The soldiers came with the spikes and as I spat every curse i knew at them, they drove them through her hands and feet. The Gods had mercy on her, and she passed out from the pain. Then it was my turn. Gods, the pain; but I knew I deserved it and more for bringing her to this place.

They lifted the crosses and drove them into the ground. With mocking and laughter they left us to die. My only consolation was the complaints I heard about the children escaping and the hell they would receive for returning to Rome empty-handed.

At last, we were alone. Gabrielle slipped in and out of consciousness. I spoke to her, assuring her that she wasn't alone. Mostly, I just wanted to hear her voice again, and I held out a small hope that the Greek soldiers would come to rescue us.

But the day wore on and she grew weaker and weaker from blood loss and the cold. Finally, as the sun began to set, I looked at her and knew that she would die.

"Hades," I screamed. "Send me to the lowest place in Tartarus!! If I live a thousand lifetimes, let me suffer through every one of them for causing this to happen!" Anguish overwhelmed me, and I began to weep.

"Xena." Her voice was barely audible.

"Gabrielle! I'm so sorry, Gabrielle. Please forgive me!" I begged.

"Not your fault. I wanted to be with you, even in death," she gasped. "Don't be afraid, Xena, we'll be together forever. Death can't separate us." A fit of coughing wracked her weak body. "Listen Xena, and remember. I will find you wherever you are, no matter what, and I will love you forever, world without end."

Her eyes closed and a final breath rattled out of her body and she was gone.

"NO!"

"NO!"

"no."

My soul was dead, but my body lasted the rest of the night. Finally, as the traitorous sun threatened to rise without Gabrielle, I felt my heart break and the merciful blackness took me.

* * *

Blair rocked me in his arms as I wept, whispering comforts and promises like a mother would to a child.

"My fault, all my fault," was all I could say.

"No, Jim. It wasn't your fault. She chose to be with you. I chose then and I choose now. Listen to me Jim, 'Though lovers be lost, love will not and death will have no dominion'."

That was a week ago and, as time has passed, I've begun to understand. Xena cursed herself for a thousand lifetimes for what she blamed herself for causing, and I've paid for it in my life with fear, pain and betrayal. But Gabrielle, with her dying breath, tempered the curse, with a promise: she would come to me always and when she came the darkness would be driven away by the power of her love. And so it's happened to me. Gabrielle was reborn as Blair and he's given me all the joy and hope that I've ever longed for.

I've remembered bits and pieces of other lives. Not much, but enough to know that this has happened before and it will happen again. This is my Karma.

I respect the Mendi and study its mysteries with gratitude. By giving me Xena's memories, it's helped me to find a peace that I've never known. I no longer live in fear because I now know what lies beyond the setting sun: love forever, world without end.

End


End file.
